on making & making & making
Earlier, when I finished setting up my home page, after agonizing over it for at least an hour, I gushed to Sung that this felt just like when I agonized over the CSS for my tumblr back in highschool. So it's only fitting that I'm sitting here at almost 12am on my couch in complete pitch black save for the glow on my computer keys and screen totally ruining my eyes, listening to the same song on repeat and repeat and repeat.
But anyways, nostalgia aside, why am I here? I think about this phrase making & making & making a lot. Every time I spend a night after work in my sketchbook, or at my ceramics studio, or going down some new hobby rabbit hole, I think about this phrase. It plays in my head on a loop (insert something about hyperfixation here) reminding me that I feel that this is why I'm here. This - making & creating - is why I'm on this earth. It is the easiest and most difficult thing in the world for me. I'm always itching to make more, and then finding it hard to find the motivation to start, or crumbling under the pressure that I need to have the end goal perfect in my head before I can start. But at the end, it's really about the making (& making & making) that make me feel like a person.
I'm here because I've wanted to share this feeling and the things that I make more, amidst many many many inevitable sidebars on movies and books and gardening and other things I stumble across in the world. Or maybe I'm just here to recapture that 14 year old magic of carving out a little space in the world that feels like my own.
In any case, I'm happy to be here and that you are too.
-E